Thursday, January 06, 2005

in which i am forsaken by technology

Near the end of November, the television in my apartment finally broke. This wasn't really a surprise, since my housemate had purchased it for $30 a couple of years ago and we'd been dealing with some weird flickering and green tintage for several months. At last, it reached the point where no amount of beating could make the picture tube work again. So, no TV. Neither of us have had time to go buy a new one yet.

The Internet in our apartment died on December 21st. The cause of this is a long story. Suffice it to say that if you make something idiotproof, someone will just make a better idiot (this idiot was neither myself, nor my housemate). It still doesn't work, which, as you will see, is kind of immaterial right now.

On the bus out of Kingston a couple days later, I was stuck in the parking lot of the Whitby GO station for two hours when the brake valve froze and the extra bus they sent kind of didn't show up.

The second night I was back in Kingston, on Tuesday, the power briefly went out while I was sleeping. In the morning, I couldn't get my computer monitor to work again, even though the CPU was working. It's probably fine, since I spent almost no time trying to fix it — I was willing to go without MP3s until I felt like sitting down and unplugging and re-plugging things.

This morning I woke up at 9 half-frozen to death, despite having all the blankets on the bed and wearing one of those sweatshirt nightgown monstrosities. It had gotten really cold outside overnight and, apparently, inside as well. I noticed that my alarm clock wasn't on, but it wasn't flashing either. There was no power in my room, the bathroom, the other bedroom, or the better part of the living room. This also meant that there was no heat in those rooms. (At least the power wasn't out in the kitchen; it would have been really irritating if the fridge and deep freezer weren't working.) I called Mini-Larry the assistant super (the real super is also named Larry), who replaced all the fuses to no avail, and who later informed me that the electrician can't come until tomorrow. Lucky for me, I just bought some long underwear.

Maybe this has all been an attempt by divine providence to get me to work on my outstanding essays:
"Now you can't watch TV instead of writing essays."
"Now you can't surf the internet instead of writing essays."
"Now your computer monitor doesn't work, so maybe you should go to the library and work on your essays."
"I HAVE DEPRIVED YOUR HOME OF LIGHT AND HEAT! GO TO THE LIBRARY AND WORK ON YOUR ESSAYS!"

So, I went to the library . . . and updated my weblog, because that's how you win at life. Now I'm going downtown to buy extension cords and some blackout beer (probably Waterloo Dark).

"Yes, I love technology, but not as much as you, you see, but I still love technology, always and forever." - Napoleon Dynamite

Oh, you want a year-end list? Here's a year-end list:

1. SUCK IT, TREBEK.