Thursday, February 24, 2005

i don't believe in modern love

Long time, no blog. The Local Black & Red spent Valentine's Day with her heterosexual life partner at Clark watching Khaki Snack. It pretty much ruled. "What they didn't print in The Journal was that I said, 'I know FOR A FACT that Ethan Rabidoux has sex with dead people.'" Because Chris Provan sounded sad on the Internet, I brought him a valentine, which might have been awkward if there had not been ample social lubricant.

We could have spent Valentine's Day at AJ's Hangar for the finals of K-Rock's X-TREME Bandslam, but there were two problems:
1) We didn't really like any of the bands playing (although we love JKKB's website bunches)
2) "Misery clings to the walls like asbestos" - Vanessa on AJ's
We know #2 because we went to Round 2 of X-TREME Bandslam, which did feature eventual winners The Emily Fennel Band. Also playing were The Vinicious Knids and Wideye. Apparently The Vinicious Knids were pretty bad, but they just made me think about back in the day when I went to punk shows in K-W — not because I particularly even liked punk, but because there wasn't much else to do if you were underage, and I liked seeing live music. I guess fond memories can make you partly deaf to bad music. Wideye were . . . uh . . . yeah. The only way I could get through their set without rendering myself unconscious was to try to understand them as the Spinal Tap of nu-rock, down to their hilarious facial hair and use of a flying-V bass. They still completely ruined throwing the horns for me for about two weeks. The Emily Fennel Band were at least listenable, talented musicians, and very professional, even though it was all too adult-contemporary pop/new country for me.

Basically the best part was when Vanessa sent me pictures from The Radical Dudez's pretty-good-but-definitely-not-good-enough set, and I was like, "Holy crap, it looks like the bass player is shooting a laser out of his arm!" and Vanessa was like, "What?" and I was like, "He's a robot! WITH A LASER!" and Vanessa was like, "What?" and I was like, "LASER!" but by then I had opened MS Paint to explain myself and it was all over.

As far as I'm concerned, that's the best thing that came out of Bandslam, right there. (Oh, and Slaves Of Spanky juggling their shoes, but I didn't get to see that.)

While I was home for four days to have a dentist appointment and see my mom, we ended up having to put one of our dogs to sleep. We adopted Bailey from the pound when I was in Grade 7 or something. At the time, he weighed 85 pounds and was referred to by the humane society staff as "Lamb Chop." Bailey's health deteriorated very rapidly very suddenly, although it turns out he had some kind of cancer spread through the blood that was basically erupting everywhere at once, so the cancer itself must have been there for a while. It wasn't a good sign when I came home and his rectum was inside out, but a day later he couldn't go up or down stairs, and then he was blind in both eyes, and then there was the unmistakable stink of a dying animal.

One of the most "classic" Bailey stories is the time we had a bunch of family friends over watching the 1996 Summer Olympics, when Donovan Bailey won a gold medal. We were watching the 100m dash, and everyone was yelling "GO BAILEY GO!" Bailey got very excited and, as he did when very excited, peed everywhere, including all over one of the houseguests.

Also, one time he ate a plastic garden gnome. True story.

*David Bowie, "Modern Love"