"it's two in the afternoon, it's a tuesday, i'm in my underwear, playing warcraft III"

3 Simple Reasons To See B.A. Johnston on Tuesday Night:

1. "Dying Alone" (warning: contains a naughty word)
2. "Humpty Dumpty"
3. B.A. speaking about his new record, My Heart Is A Blinking Nintendo:

   "Old Nintendos blink, especially when you want to play a hot game like Marble Madness or Tecmo Bowl. It's like something great is right there and you can't get to play it. I guess my heart is like that because it never gets to play Legend Of Zelda or Excite Bike, and it feels gypped. The happy B.A. is just a shell. Inside, I am a bitter boiling ball of sad rage, kind of like an M&M. Outside, a hard happy candy shell, inside, bitter chocolate."

So join us at the Elixir for New Music Night, the first date of B.A.'s "No Fans, No Money, No Chicks, No Car Mega Tour," and raise a bottle of 50 to what may be the only good thing to ever come out of Hamilton.

Still to come: Top 5 Songs About Rejection, and an entry about fire (including the AFTERMATH of FAKE PROM)!

I am very, very cranky these days, for which I apologize.

*B.A. Johnston, "Dying Alone"